All's Fair in Oven War
By absentee Posted in Futurama | Humor | Miscellanea | The Simpsons | things you always wanted to say but were afraid nobody else thought — Comments (76) / Email this page » / Leave a comment »
Promoted by Jeff. Seriously, where else can you get this kind of value for your online buck?
So during the President's final State of the Union address, my wife started laughing hysterically. I know what you are thinking; but what she was really laughing at was our Attorney General, Michael Mukasey.
Now, granted, Mukasey isn't who you normally think of when you think of hysterical laughing. I'd venture to say that no attorney is at the forefront of your mind when you're talking about hysterical laughter. Hysteria, maybe, but not in a fun way. (Yes yes, cheap shot at lawyers. Yes, I know, the subpoena is in the mail, Erick.)
Read on.
Anyway, like I said, at first I didn't know what she was laughing at. I paused the TiVo and played it back. "He looks just like the old guy from Futurama!" she said, with a visible lack of my encyclopedic Futurama trivia knowledge.
"It's Professor Farnsworth," I cleverly retorted.
She was right, he did look like him. I took a photo of the paused screen, which tells you what Friday nights are like at my pad. Oh yeah, we're all party. Anyway, it started me thinking about funny blog topics. I couldn't think of any, and off to bed I went.
Finally, though, I decided to just jump in. The first thing I did was make one of those "separated at birth" comparison images:
Michael Mukasey and Professor Hubert Farnsworth
It's funny right? Look at those glasses! Nevertheless, I didn't really have a blog topic. "Who else is funny," I thought ... Umm, cleverly. I thought about all the government officials, elected representatives and politicians. I pondered. I even cogitated. "No one," I answered myself aloud, and off to bed I went.
Later it occurred to me that Matt Groening is funny. Mukasey isn't funny, he just looks like something funny that Groening drew. There had to be a blog in this.
But still, there was nothing. So I decided to think about who looks like who in Futurama or The Simpsons. You know who Hillary reminds me of? Lindsay Naegle. I don't know why. It might be the way she casually admitted "I'm a sexual predator" in answer to Marge's question about her frequent job changes. It might be the job history itself. It might be the hair. I don't know, but I went for a joke image:
Hillary Clinton and Lindsay Naegle
I thought, "this is funny" and off to bed I went.
I still didn't have a humorous blog topic. It was all one off. Something funny was there, but I just couldn't get hold of it, no matter how much I spoke to myself or how many times I went to sleep. It had been hours since the State of the Union and I had no topic. I figured maybe I should try out some of our candidates.
The first guy I thought of was Mitt Romney. I don't know why, he's rich, he's photogenic. Seems like a good target for satire. The problem was, he didn't really look like anyone. After awhile, I thought of a joke that pertains to some characterizations of Mitt, which are not necessarily my characterizations, but that would nevertheless be recognizable to ... you know, I'll just let you get the joke yourself.
Mitt Romney and Bender
Ok, now, settle down. I'm only kidding. Hey, it's better than what I thought about using:
Heh. Hey I kid! Mitt will be fine. Don't you worry about Mitt, let me worry about blank.
Ok, then I thought, well I'm going to have to spread the wealth. Who else can I make fun of? And for whatever reason, Huckabee just popped in my head.
It wasn't easy trying to find a match for Huckabee. There was his perpetual runner-up status to consider. I get kind of a side-kick vibe.
I stared at his picture and then it hit me. Like, hard, so off to bed I went. But then:
Mike Huckabee and Kif Kroker
Alright, that one is pretty funny I thought. I can picture Huckabee singing "Total Eclipse of the Heart" on a karaoke stage, I really can. Not a perfect match but I really can see the similarity there. Really.
Again, it's better than the one I almost used:
As Elzar might say, "Bam!"
Oh man, I just suddenly realized. You know who really reminds me of Lindsay Naegle?
John Edwards is Lindsay Naegle
Important to note I've never seen them in the same place at the same time. Come to think of it, I've never seen Ron Paul and Ross Perot ... nah OK.
Anyway, Edwards got off easy. Here's what I was going to use:
Oh, and uh, speaking of Ron Paul:
I couldn't just hit also-rans, lawyers, democrats and Ron Paul of the planet Omicron Persei Eight.
I still didn't have a topic, you see. I still didn't have a funny blog to bring it all together. I mean, Edwards is a lamp is funny and all, but what do you close with? Where do you go from there?
It has to be John McCain. Frontrunner for the Presidency makes you the big target. There were a lot of ways to go with the Senator. I had to narrow it down if I was ever going to think of a blog and break the nap cycle.
I mean, the obvious first choice is mean old Mr. Burns:
Ok, not bad. There are similarities there. I bet John could do a mean impression of mean old man Burns if he wanted to.
The next obvious choice would be super-veteran Zapp Brannigan:
mmmmm, meh.
If there were better images of John on SNL I could go somewhere with that one. That appearance was really .... something.
Neither one was perfect. Still, they're both better than what I was going to use:
Heh. Ok, I'm just kidding around. I like all these guys. Ok not all of them, but I like three of them alright.
Seems we can still have some laughs around here, although I never did figure out what to blog about. Oh well, off to bed I went.
BAM!
absentee
They'll have to pry Futurama references from my cold dead fingers. Love that show.
absentee
I heard rumor that Groening was going to bring this one back. You hear anything?
Fighting for conservatism one day at a time.
But if they do make new episodes, the local animal population will welcome the cessation of sacrifices.
Fox doesn't answer my mail so I've, uh, moved to unconventional motivation techniques.
absentee
that I should listen to my brother less than 0% of the time on stuff like this. He may be about as good as Krugman (I think its him) at prediction recessions. The saying goes something like he has predicted 10 out of the last 4 recessions or something like that.
Fighting for conservatism one day at a time.
"Bender's Big Score" was released last November. There will be three more full-length DVDs released, and then those four DVDs will be broken down into 16 episodes, which will be shown on Comedy Central:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Futurama#Future_and_DVD_movies
Is that what you were referring to, or something else?
I'll have to check it out.
Fighting for conservatism one day at a time.
I'm hoping RS3.0 has an auto recommend for any of your comedic blogs. They are much needed with all of the End of the World™ going on here lately.
Fighting for conservatism one day at a time.
I hurt myself laughing at Silky Pony and the LAMP!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Awesome.
------------
~ Beth ~
So I must recommend this.
But I will quibble on McCain its obvious he is Cotton Hill Hank Hill's father
______________________________
"Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom must, like men, undergo the fatigue of supporting it."
-Thomas Paine: The American Crisis, No. 4, 1777
I'd have chosen Captain Hazel "Hank" Murphy from Sea Lab but I was trying to limit it to the two Groening hits.
absentee
I think we all know who that is. ;-)
------------
~ Beth ~
Fighting for conservatism one day at a time.
If you've heard the Cybernetic Ghost of Christmas Past...From the Future! speak, you'd agree:
"Hey, I call 'em like I see 'em. I'm a whale biologist."
Since RP is quitting/not quitting, maybe his cult followers will be catching the next comet. (One can hope, right?)
------------
~ Beth ~
And right before off to bed I went.
absentee
He was my choir director as a kid.
A flake of flakes.
I just assumed everything was being saved for future generations archaeological amusement.
absentee
I would never have thought of that play on words.
For some reason, it also made me remember "Hardware Wars".
It's the title of an episode of The Simpsons, when Marge enters a cooking competition.
Hardware Wars! Man I haven't thought of that in years!
absentee
that all the KosKids get hacked off that they didn't think of this first. (Maybe they did...I've only wandered over there once...found the content to be lacking)
Fighting for conservatism one day at a time.
Don't blame me, I voted for Kodos.
___________________________________
Two thirds of the world is covered by water,
the other third is covered by Champ Bailey.
I'm gonna write in Nixon's head.
Fighting for conservatism one day at a time.
Homer: America, take a good look at your beloved candidates. They're nothing but hideous space reptiles.
[Homer unmasks them]
[audience gasps in terror]
Kodos: It's true, we are aliens. But what are you going to do about it? It's a two-party system; you have to vote for one of us.
[murmurs]
Man1: He's right, this is a two-party system.
Man2: Well, I believe I'll vote for a third-party candidate.
Kang: Go ahead, throw your vote away.
[Kang and Kodos laugh out loud]
[Ross Perot smashes his "Perot 96" hat]
___________________________________
Two thirds of the world is covered by water,
the other third is covered by Champ Bailey.
______________________________
"Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom must, like men, undergo the fatigue of supporting it."
-Thomas Paine: The American Crisis, No. 4, 1777
they moved my picture...gotta try again
Fighting for conservatism one day at a time.
Save the image off and upload it to photobucket or some equivalent, if you don't have your own webhost. Saves the trouble of worrying about where the image went, and it will save the other party's bandwidth by not hotlinking it.
I already use photobucket for when I create screen caps to put into posts. I'm not sure why I failed to think about that one. I shall from now on, thanks Canthros.
Fighting for conservatism one day at a time.
is so Guenther. there's nothing there without the prop. hell, he IS the prop. of course, any character with a "magic" hat draws comparisons to John Kerry too ;)
and shouldn't that be Fred Thompson holding up the "APPLAUSE" sign? plus it's easy to imagine the Myth of Fred Thompson saying "Bite my shiny metal..." well, you know the rest, no?
(yes I posted this before)
I couldn't stop noticing the resemblence after my mom pointed out Mike Huckabee looks like Fluffy the Hamster of Creature Comforts fame (an Aardman animation creation... you know, the guys who did Chicken Run and Wallace and Gromit)).
BTW, I love the futurama references, in case you couldn't tell from my tag.
"Hey, I call 'em like I see 'em. I'm a whale biologist."
You have my favorite sig line on the site.
absentee
a Simpsons/ Futurama trivial pursuit player!
...it's all really lost on me.
Ok, so it's confession time:
I've never watched a single episode of The Simpsons or Futurama.
No TV and no beer makes Homer something something! You should watch. It might contain a monster or some kind of weird mirror. These are just examples, it could also be something much better.
absentee
with him. It's probably time I do so.
All the different cartoons for adults have their claims to fame, but for my money Futurama was the cleverest and the often the subtlest. Of course, they say madness runs in my family. Some even call me mad! And why? Because I dared to dream … of my own race of atomic monsters! Atomic supermen with octagonal-shaped bodies that suck blood out of...
... anyway, it's clever.
absentee
Interesting...
Not like Bender:
"Interesting. No, wait, the other thing: tedious."
absentee
There's never a question what he's thinking about.
The one-eyed gal is hilarious too. I've known several women just like her.
It is nice to see we can take a step back from the trenches of ideological/philosophical warfare and wrangling to see the humor and fun in politics.
Futurama is funnier than most the Simpsons... it never got the recognition it deserved.
My wife and I watched it after Family Guy on Cartoon Network a couple of years ago, and we realized the sarcasm and timing of the show was simply sly and brilliant.
Gov. Huckabee looks a bit like -->
Huckleberry Hound beats out Kif Kroker in the Mike Huckabee look-alike contest on the basis of name alone--but the facial similarity is uncanny as well.
The "Third Worst Person in the World" and aiming higher.
i see that while i've been out of town for the weekend (yes, the parents are great, the fishing at Eufala not so great, thanks for asking) you've been running amok. again.
Kill the terrorists
Protect the borders
Punch the hippies -- Frank J
i think little johnny edwards bears a striking resemblance to Daphne on Scooby Doo.
Kill the terrorists
Protect the borders
Punch the hippies -- Frank J
and Hillary is the spitting image of J Jonah Jameson:
I mean, SPOT ON!
Kill the terrorists
Protect the borders
Punch the hippies -- Frank J
Sorry about the slow fishing, but it's better than no fishing. I'm sick in bed going on 4 days now.
absentee
I'm saving up for a future cliches post and 'spot on' just made the list. You've got the ignominious distinction of being the blogger to achieve saturation point.
absentee
Get well ASAP, man. You can always count on me for tired old cliches. In general, my posts consist of a series of tired old cliches, connected by a few overused conjunctions.
Kill the terrorists
Protect the borders
Punch the hippies -- Frank J
HTML Help for Red Staters
"If we want to take this party back, and I think we can someday, let’s get to work." – Barry Goldwater
Please! This is supposed to be a happy occasion. Let's not bicker and argue over who killed who.
absentee
HTML Help for Red Staters
"If we want to take this party back, and I think we can someday, let’s get to work." – Barry Goldwater
HTML Help for Red Staters
"If we want to take this party back, and I think we can someday, let’s get to work." – Barry Goldwater
Oh, what a giveaway! Did you hear that? Did you hear that, eh? That's what I'm on about! Did you see him repressing me? You saw him, didn't you?
absentee
"I'm saving up for a future cliches post and 'spot on' just made the list. You've got the ignominious distinction of being the blogger to achieve saturation point."
In this context, wouldn't that be "tipping point," and another cliche to add to the list?
The "Third Worst Person in the World" and aiming higher.
How the Dems will solve a brokered convention:
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/a/a8/Simpson_men.png
plus: John Edwards:
http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/thumb/e/eb/200px-Lyle_Lanl...
And wherever men are fighting against barbarism, tyranny, and massacre, for freedom, law, and honour, let them remember that the fame of their deeds, even though they may be exterminated, may perhaps be celebrated as long as the world rolls round. ~ Winston Churchill
HTML Help for Red Staters
"If we want to take this party back, and I think we can someday, let’s get to work." – Barry Goldwater
It seems so, though I didn't know about that. I was going for the robotic accolade seeker. Not that that is my characerization, just a funny one.
Too bad I didn't know about the applause thing though. I'd have changed the sign to read: CONSERVATIVE!
Again, all in good fun.
absentee
THAT'S McCain...can't you just hear him yelling "Limbaugh!"?
Absentee's brother as famously heard on Rush Limbaugh....
Absentee's famous bro' makes an appearance.
Aglanon...An association of the relatives of people suffering from Addiction to Agliculture.
The "Third Worst Person in the World" and aiming higher.
will champion the cause of conservatism you are in for a rather unpleasant surprise. He lost 2000 being his authentic self and he is determined to not make the same mistake again. You'll see what I mean after the republican convention when he starts running to the left.
Ooh, your powers of deduction are exceptional. I can't allow you to waste them here when there are so many crimes going unsolved at this very moment. Go, go, for the good of the city.
BAM!
absentee
Though you could have just taken the easy route with "Worst.Comment.Ever." and not had to worry about the appropriateness of the single sentence words :)
___________________________________
Two thirds of the world is covered by water,
the other third is covered by Champ Bailey.
is the best argument for why Redstate needs a Hall of Fame.
-TS
"When men fear work or fear righteous war, when women fear motherhood, they tremble on the brink of doom; and well it is that they should vanish from the earth." - Teddy Roosevelt
Best Blog Ever.
God bless you absentee for your Futurama references.
Fighting for conservatism one day at a time.