Redstate

By Skanderbeg Posted in Archived — Comments (18) / Email this page » / Leave a comment »

While everyone was focused on yesterday's silly announcement that a species that is growing in numbers by leaps and bounds is to be declared "threatened," no one seems to have thought of the obvious question: What do the polar bears themselves actually think?

Despite my tight schedule, I slipped off yesterday for a quick jaunt north to gauge their reaction to the news.

Surprisingly, reaction was rather muted to say the least....

These two couldn't be roused from their slumber to react.

I thought I'd have better luck when I ran into a group of polar bear investment bankers who were headed down to the local ice pub for a few cold ones. After consuming a couple cases of beer a piece, they were quite relaxed and animated....

However, at that point, all they could do was belch voluminously and giggle.

Once I regained consciousness, with a splitting headache to show for my efforts to bond with polar bear culture, I finally managed to sit down for a much-needed coffee with a very polite polar bear outplacement director. He explained to me that the polar bears actually aren't terribly worried by any of this. Even if their habitat remains just fine and dandy - or even expands a bit more - these days with the big population growth there are just too many polar bears. So they have been working diligently to place polar bears in new positions, to which most have been adapting splendidly.

Some have been showing tendencies toward delinquency, conspicuous consumerism, and consumption of non-local foodstuffs:

However, most of his outplacement cases are adapting quite nicely:

So, the message is that the polar bears are doing fine and adapting quite nicely.

It's the "environmentalists" who aren't.